With financnces, and constantly battle about money???
I'm getting very tired and seem to want to beat my head on a hard door in order to get my husband to agree financially to commit to being debt free. He likes to spend cash/money/debit cards/etc etc.
1. We have separate checking/savings accounts.
2. I put cash into his checking account to do as he wishes. He has to pay for his vehicle, and little bills.
3. I pay for everything else.
4. I maintain my own savings account.
I'm getting tired of having to go "without" anything extra. Let me state that he does his share financially, in paying his bills on time. But he SPENDS some serious cash that is left over, and takes money out of his savings account to SPEND.
The kids don't go without anything. I'd like to get them new sneakers for Christmas, and some "fun stuff". I am feeling deprived, and since I work a lot, I feel that at some point, I should be able to do something that I enjoy with the kids. We did go out for dinner last night, and a movie last week. It was FUN!!!
I'm tired of fighting about money, lack of help around the house when I am working to support the family, and I'm worn out with the constant battles. I even thought about getting my own place (renting), but that would not be in our best interest as a family.
Any suggestions? I'd like to keep my sanity, my family intact, and am thankful that I am capable of providing for the five of us.
I guess I need a nap.
So what happens when he runs out of money before pay day? Do you put more in? If your husband gets a spending allowance so should you.
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I both have an allowance to do with as we choose. This pays for eating out, movies, clothes, etc. All non-necessities. We used to get a lot of money each for our allowance before we had kids. But slowly over the years we've had to cut it back since now we have a house and kids to pay for.
Maybe you could ask him to make 1 small little change at a time and then once it becomes habit add a new change.
If he runs out and I have it to spare, I do put more into his account. I refuse to withdraw any out of my savings, and he does take cash out of his. I'm thinking that it's become more of a problem as the holidays get closer. I can only do so much, as I am only one person. I usually give him a set amount of money every pay period. When I do get some extra money for myself, I usually donate the money towards a ton of canned goods for the local food bank (it's a passion of mine). It makes me feel great when I donate, so I do it as often as I can.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what to say as I'm dealing with a similar situation (a hubby who loves to spend and doesn't care one bit about debt). But just know you're not alone! I hope you can figure something out to maintain sanity for sure. Its not fair. I wish I could splurge sometimes but only one person in this family ever does any splurging. I'm not sure how to fix it either.
ReplyDeleteHe's a good person, but has some spending issues. If we did not have separate accounts, we would be BROKE. I don't mind helping him out when I have extra money, but seriously, it is sometimes a hard ship to support his habit, and maintain the home for five of us.
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